Chicken Parmigiana

Super easy recipe for a popular Italian-American favorite. So simple, even I can do this without screwing it up.

First off, chicken breast is good for you. Just over four ounces (that 120 grams for you metric types) of this packs a wealth of minerals and vitamins. Aside from its vital Niacin and B6 vitamins, chicken contains Phosphorous and Selenium (over 20% RDA of each). Selenium is an element used by your immune system and is used in larger amounts in medicines to treat diseases such as bird flu, cancer, HIV and thyroid conditions. Phosphorous is used in bone and live cell production and makes WICKED glow-in the dark pigments... but no it won't make you glow. Granted, there is significant amount of cholesterol in chicken (4 ounces = 23% RDA) and most store-purchased chicken is loaded with sodium for flavor enhancement and preservation. The benefits outweigh it all. Don't go eating a plate full of chicken, but don't deny yourself of this beneficial food if you take it in moderation.

Okay back to the food.

I use the following to make my C.P. (three servings)

• 12-13 oz of skinless, boneless chicken breast
• Two egg whites
• 2/3 cup bread crumbs (homemade, plain)
• Paprika, Oregano, Black pepper, Garlic Powder
• Spaghetti sauce (room temp)
• Grated (or fresh) Parmesan cheese
• Shredded Mozzarella cheese (optional)
• Vegetable oil

Weapons of mass culinary dysfunction needed:

• Frying pan
• Baking pan (9x9"-ish)
• Two bowls
• Meat tenderizer (vicious-looking hammer or cudgel device)

Slice the chicken into 4 - 4 1/2 oz portions.  Focus all the day's stress, anger, confusion, annoyance, sorrow and frustration through your arm, into the hammer, wield it as if were Excalibur and violently thrash each piece of chicken as if it were the single cause of every hardship you have ever endured. Who needs anger management? Just knock around an innocent piece of lifeless chicken. Seriously, though... you want to hammer each chunk into a 1/2" thick flat "patty". Don't worry if it tends to flake apart a little.


Grab a deep frying pan if you have one and add enough oil so that you have a pool no more than 1/4" deep. Heat the pan (and oil) to frying temperature (~300F) but not too hot. Preheat the oven to 400F.

While this is heating up, in a bowl add your egg whites and spices. Mix them up. When the oil is hot, dip a clod of chicken mass into the egg solution then coat with breadcrumbs. Lay the breaded chicken in the pan and fry on each side for 45-seconds. When done, place the fried piece on a paper towel to absorb excess oil then place in baking pan. Do this for each piece of chicken.

Once all pieces are in the baking pan bake for 10 mins in pre-heated oven. Flip. Add a bit of sauce on each top each with cheese and bake for 10 mins more.

Serve with pasta and/or a nice salad, or make sandwiches.

This recipe might be possible to substitute catfish for the chicken. However if you try this, ease up on the level of violence needed.

Never Buy Croutons

Ok... that title is a bit too authoritative. Buy them if you like. However, if you would like to try something different, you can very easily make your own. My wife loves these, which is really saying something since she is one tough customer.


Here is everything you need:

• Bread (any kind, sliced, white, wheat, rye, rolls, buns, breadsticks, home made, store bought, stolen, borrowed, lost, found, and so on)
• Bread knife (I use an electric for this)
• Oven or toaster oven
• Sheet pan
• Bag (paper, plastic... or even a large plastic bowl with a top)

Well, that's it really. Now if you want it to taste like something other than toast, grab any of the following:

• Salt
• Pepper
• Garlic powder
• Paprika
• Onion powder
• Ground basil
• Ground oregano
• Cayenne pepper

... just about anything


Now, here's what you do

Set your oven to 250F. You can go higher, but you don't want to toast anything, you want to dry the bread out.

Okay, while that's heating up, slice your bread into cubes. Try to make them uniformly sized (1/4" or 1/2"). The larger the cubes the longer they'll need to spend in the oven. Once you have a mound of cubes, put them into the bag or container. Add your selection of spices and SHAKE.

The moisture within the bread and the porous surface will both capture some of the spices. Continue shaking until the cubes are coated.

Dump the cubes onto an ungreased sheet pan and place in your preheated oven. The amount of time needed will depend on the type of bread used, size of cubes and how spaced apart they are. I usually give it about 20-30 mins then check. If I'm not happy, I give them 10 mins more and repeat that process until I have a bunch of crunchy cubes.

When they're done, remove the pan and let the pan and cubes cool. Once they are more or less room temperature, you can store them in a sealed container or resealable storage bag. Let them cool completely or else you will get vapor in the storage container and that could make them soggy and tough.


Take it a step further...

If you ignore the last two sentences of the instructions above and replace with "...dump them into a food processor and smash the hell outta them!" you will end up with breadcrumbs. Since January of this year these are the only breadcrumbs I use. No more wasted left-over bread.






Different seasonings

Here are some ideas for seasoning combinations I've used. There are endless possibilities. If you have a spice grinder, mix the spices together and grind them all at once into a single spice concoction for greater consistency.


Simple

• Paprika
• Touch of ground salt

Asian/oriental style

• Ginger
• Cinnamon
• Corriander
• Cumin
• Cliantro
• Touch of powdered sea salt

Italian-ish

• Ground basil
• Black pepper
• Garlic powder
• Onion powder
• Light Olivio spray before baking (add extra baking time, serve fresh)
• Paprika

Sweet croutons (great if you're including fruits in your salad)

• Cinnamon
• Nutmeg (just a hint)
• Sugar
• Hot chocolate mix

Spicy

• Cayenne pepper
• Chili powder
• Paprika
• Cumin
• Cilantro
• Hint of beef flavor (HerbOx, or instead use a powdered meat-tenderizer which is usually salt, pineapple enzyme and garlic)

Broccoli Cheese Soup

Made this for the very first time last night. Worked out quite well and needs only a little tweaking.

1 cup of chicken broth (99% fatfree from Walmart)
4 oz Velveeta cheese, cubed
1/2 cup water
1/4 cup half-n-half

1/4 cup flour (white, anything grainy will NOT work)
1/8 tsp black pepper
1/2 tsp minced onion flakes

2 cups broccoli (crowns only, no chunks, chop it up nice and fine)


Pour broth, half-n-half and water into saucepan and bring to temperature, not boiling but enough to throw some mist. Add cheese and stir until mostly melted. Add flour, pepper and onion and stir until combined and smooth.

I used an electric mixed in the hot mixture to ensure a very consistant and "lump-free" result.

Bring the mixture to boiling, stirring often. Mix in broccoli and reduce to low. Cover and let simmer for 20 minutes. Stir every couple minutes.


Once done, ladel into bowls and garnish as desired (I used a few whole fresh parsley leaves and a dash of yellow cheddar cheese). This batched served three, though could be stretched to four with smaller portions.


I don't normally eat this since it will challenge my thus successful diet, however "broc-o-cheese" soup is one of my wife's all-time favorites. According to her and my son, the broccoli pieces could have been cooked more (they were a little too firm). The taste was reportedly "awesome" (yes, those words were used).


Next, time I will try one of the two following approaches:

• Steam the broccoli (whole) for 10 minutes before the crowns are chopped and placed into the soup
• Use frozen broccoli crowns in the hot soup and only simmer for 5-10 minutes. Though I am unsure how this would react with the cheese and the resulting flavor. In a pinch it might be easier.